


In All Things A Reason

by mad_martha



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: AU, Angst, Drama, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-09-03
Updated: 2011-09-03
Packaged: 2017-10-23 09:38:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,380
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/248874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mad_martha/pseuds/mad_martha
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Two paths diverge …</p>
            </blockquote>





	In All Things A Reason

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted in April 2005, well before _Deathly Hallows_ was published. My original notes said: "I've been brooding for some time on the tiny scraps of information J. K. Rowling has given us about Petunia Dursley. Something I dimly recall seeing in an interview transcript was the question of whether Petunia was a Muggle/squib/witch, to which JKR replied something like "No, but …" and didn't finish the sentence. Anyway, it occurred to me that if Aunt Petunia isn't exactly a Muggle and isn't exactly a squib and certainly isn't a witch, then what I've written below may be a possibility."

Lily Evans arrived at the main entrance at a run, her auburn hair flying loose from her pigtails and her robe hanging off one shoulder. There was a small crowd of other pupils there; she had to wriggle her way through them, but when she finally reached the front she came to an abrupt halt.

The headmaster was there. So was little Professor Flitwick, the Head of Ravenclaw House, and her own House Head, Professor McGonagall. And standing with them, in her Muggle clothes and with her trunk at her feet, was Lily's older sister Petunia. She was as white as a sheet and her eyes were red as though she had been crying, but when she saw her sister her expression hardened and her chin lifted defiantly.

When she saw Lily, Professor McGonagall began to shoo the other pupils away sharply.

"Go about your business, all of you! There's nothing to be seen here …."

It took several minutes, but eventually they all melted away, talking in muted tones. Lily could still feel an odd pressure like eyes on the back of her neck, though, as though people were still watching. It might just be the portraits, but - The deputy headmistress's voice sharply recalled her.

"Miss Evans, your sister is going home. You may have a few minutes to say your farewells."

Lily stared. Professor McGonagall looked grim, Professor Flitwick distressed, and the headmaster … Professor Dumbledore looked very solemn. Lily looked at Petunia, stunned.

"Go - going home?" she faltered. "I don't understand."

Petunia drew in a sharp, audible, angry breath. "Oh, for …. Don't start squawking, Lily!"

"But _why?_ "

"Five minutes, girls," Professor McGonagall said sternly, and the three professors moved away.

"Shut up a minute and listen," Petunia said roughly, before Lily could speak. "I've been expelled. That's why they're sending me home. They're taking me to Aberdeen Station and I'll get a train back to Surrey. Mum and Dad'll meet me at the other end."

 _"Expelled?"_ Lily couldn't take it in. "There's got to be a mistake, if they expel you your wand gets snapped and - "

Petunia held out one hand. Her wand lay across her palm - in three pieces.

"It's not a mistake," she said, with a brittle smile.

"But _why?_ "

"None of your business. It served the pig right, that's all." For some reason, Lily's distress seemed to give Petunia strength and at least the appearance of being uncaring of her fate. She snorted. "Don't start grizzling about it! It's not like I ever fitted in here anyway - bunch of weirdoes and misfits and freaks!"

"How can you s-say that?" Lily began to sob. She was only a first year; she would never have had the courage to come to this school so far from all her old friends if her sister hadn't been here already. "You can't ever be a witch now or use magic - "

"Good thing too. I don't know why I listened to that old bat who turned up with her stupid letter! Look around you, Lily! I mean, really - it's like the Dark Ages here. And what good's magic if I lose all my old friends? It's not like I'll ever get a _normal_ job or anything after wasting seven years here. It's bad enough that I have so much to catch up on already."

Perhaps she actually believed what she was saying. Lily couldn't tell; all she knew was that when she looked at her older sister, a hard-faced stranger stared back at her. Petunia wasn't even the same person she'd said good morning to at breakfast.

"But what will I do without you?" Lily said miserably.

Petunia rolled her eyes impatiently. "I don't know! I don't care! I think you should chuck it here - it's not like _Muggleborns_ are ever going to get anywhere in this world." This was tossed contemptuously over her shoulder at the three waiting professors. "But you won't do that, will you? You still think it's all _magical_ and _fun_." She gave Lily a tight, angry smile. "So stick it out. Learn how to turn teacups into rats - like that'll be any use to you! - and become a complete misfit like everyone else here. Lose all your friends and stop going to normal places like normal people. But don't come running to me when it all goes wrong, Lily, because I've had it with this place and these people for ever. If I never see another wizard in my life, it won't be too soon."

There was a dull rattle of wheels on gravel and one of the school's horseless coaches pulled up in front of the entrance.

"Time to leave, Miss Evans," Professor Dumbledore said quietly, stepping up behind them.

Petunia didn't reply. She grabbed the handle of her trunk and, evading Lily's move to hug her, walked quickly down the steps, dragging the box behind her. She heaved the trunk into the carriage and climbed inside herself without a backward glance.

"Dear me," Professor Flitwick was saying distressfully. "So unfortunate - so upsetting and unnecessary …."

"I'll see her to the station and onto her train, Headmaster," Professor McGonagall said.

"Thank you, Minerva."

Lily watched as the deputy headmistress followed Petunia into the coach. If she was hoping for some final sign or acknowledgement from her sister, though, she was disappointed. With a jerk the coach set off down the long driveway towards the gates and was soon out of sight.

Professor Dumbledore was still standing in the entrance hall, regarding her gravely, when Lily turned around.

"You must not let your sister's tone upset you, Miss Evans, or her words sway you from your own course," he said kindly. "Those who leave our halls this way are often understandably bitter at what has happened to them. We must hope that Petunia comes to terms with her situation by the time you return home for the summer."

Lily didn't quite know what to say to this. She'd never had direct speech with the headmaster before; kindly as he seemed, he was a remote personage that most of the first years regarded with a kind of fascinated awe, especially those like Lily who were Muggleborn and to whom Dumbledore was held up as the very essence of wizardry by their wizard-born schoolmates.

"What happened, Sir?" she asked finally, rather timidly.

He sighed very faintly. "That, Miss Evans, is your sister's business. It would not be right or fair to break her confidence, although perhaps she may one day choose to tell you herself. I hope that may be the case."

"But what will she do now?"

"She will make her own way in the world, as all of us must. She is an intelligent and motivated young woman - I suspect she will do very well for herself." Dumbledore regarded Lily from over the top of his half-moon spectacles for a moment. "And consider this, Miss Evans," he added gently. "It is my experience of the world - for I have been alive for longer than you can know! - that everything which happens in life, happens for a purpose. We cannot know why it should be that, having set out in her life as a witch, your sister should continue it as a Muggle. But I have no doubt that there is a very good reason for it indeed. Let that be your consolation."

Lily was twelve years old. It didn't seem like much consolation at all for the loss of her sister. But in the weeks, months and years to come, when Dumbledore's words faded in her memory and were replaced by the sharp words of Petunia at every holiday, she ceased to wonder or even especially to care, until a time came when she all but forgot that her sister had ever been a witch.

Two people, however, did not forget. One was Albus Dumbledore, who remembered the bright and promising young Muggleborn Ravenclaw he had been forced to send away from Hogwarts and the curious circumstances that had brought her back into contact with his world.

The other was Petunia herself who, no matter how she tried, could never quite forget what it had felt like to summon light to the tip of her wand with a single word and to turn a teacup into a rat.

**Author's Note:**

> My original end note said: Another possibility, of course, is that Petunia is a witch and has chosen to give up magic voluntarily, either after she left Hogwarts or by not accepting her place there when she got her letter. Both explanations would explain a great deal, I think. Expulsion would explain her anger and violent aversion to all things magical, while giving up magic voluntarily - perhaps out of fear of Voldemort? - would explain her determination to stamp it out of Harry if she could. If either of these possibilities is true, then it certainly adds an interesting dimension to her relationship with Harry as his guardian now that Voldemort has returned.


End file.
